“I’m not currently eating, therefore I am starving.”
“I need to redecorate, but it can wait until the human has just fallen asleep.”
“My cagemate is minding her own business. Now is the perfect time to ATTACK!!!!”
“The human gave us a large bowl of oatmeal. There is enough for both of us, and the bowl is big enough for us both to eat without bothering the other. Therefore, I must shove my cagemate out of the way and sit in the bowl so she can’t have any.”
“If I snub the veggies, the human will have to give me yogurt drops instead so I don’t starve.”
“Everything new must be licked, chewed, or peed on. This includes but is not limited to: humans, clothes, knitting needles, books, phones, and phone chargers.”
“I could easily climb up mom’s leg by grabbing her pants, but she would much prefer I go inside her pant leg and dig my claws into her skin.”
“I cannot possibly finish this whole strawberry, I could let my cagemate finish it, but it would be much better to stash it inside the couch cushions and forget about it.”
“I have to go potty. There is a litter pan eight inches away, but I am comfy in my hammock. Bed pee it is, then.”
“This thing smells inexpensive. I will not chew it, that would be beneath me. This other thing smells very, very expensive. Clearly I must chew only the finest things in life.”
Rat logic
Published
konekorambles 