I’ve been awak for 26 straight hours after sleeping maybe 6 if i was lucky yesterday and guess who’s expected to clean up after dinner which i would be okay with helping if there wasn’t my spoiled ass little brother sitting on his butt in front of his computer playing overwatch like he had been since he got up at noon and i use the kitchen significantly less than he does and i don’t think he has washed a single dish or touched the dishwasher ONCE in the two years we’ve both been living here and usually i can live with it but WHAT THE FUCK MAKES HIM SO FUCKING SPECIAL THAT HE CAN GET AWAY WITHOUT DOING SHIT AROUND THE HOUSE ON ANY FUCKING OCCASION like. “he’s educating himself” no mother he is consuming and then regurgitating fucking neo-nazi 101 or trying to send me back into an eating disorder relapse or watching philosophy youtube videos at 2x speed and then acting like he’s the fucking pinnacle of human intellect becuase you’ve never put the pretentious little shit in his place in his entire fucking life

i usually handle this okay but i am at a breaking point for so many reasons and i ate a full meal at dinner for the first time in two days and i want to curl up and die or run myself further into the ground on the treadmill and i dont know why this is happening it feels like the cyclical depression is back and i dont want this i want it to stop